I felt a little upset while browsing instagram because my whole feed was practically revolving around love, flowers & couples; of which none I was ever a proper part of.
I got over it after a while though; I was happy for my friends - those who have been celebrating valentine's annually since long ago, and those who are celebrating valentine's for the first time. When will it be my turn?
I thought, if I wasn't sad that I'm single on an ordinary day, I shouldn't be sad today. Because this sadness would then be out of envy, that I didn't have flowers and the chance to celebrate a day that everyone else gets to celebrate; and not due to the lack of love.
Truth is, I do not feel that I lack love at all. I have great friends, brother, mom, dad (though the latter 2 can be annoying at times); and colleagues that I wouldn't exchange anything for. I have to say, this strange optimism is truly from the bottom of my heart..
I would be happy if I spent today like everyone else, with a guy who is there for completion sake (like last year). But that would be for the wrong reason; and I've learnt that such happiness is short-lived, and that it's unworthy to get my mind fucked and heart played by someone who is just trying his luck to get out of singlehood.
I am, honestly, quite sick of short-lived happiness. Who knows? My current situation might actually be the best for me.
// ends up I got a flower and some chocolates too! ^^ Best bestie on earth!
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